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Sometimes, there's no substitute...
Saturday, February 25th, 2006 11:33 pmI made it through steamed chicken and rice for lunch today, so I decided I was ready to come off the jello diet. Dinner tonight was roast beef, rice, and vegetables. Matt made delicious gravy from the roast, and when he offered a bit of the leftover gravy to Truffles (for whom the gravy is the best and only part of the wet cat food worth eating), she turned her nose up at it. "Not enough byproducts?" I suggested. I didn't know what other cause there could be.
But food substitutions aren't only unwelcome in kitty land...
Newman's Own Spelt Pretzels = good. Amazingly good. Just like the real thing, or maybe better.
Newman's Own Wheat free, dairy free Oreos = just the thing to put you off eating, for good.
I said this to Matt, so of course, he had to go and try his own Newman Oreo. I followed him to the kitchen and refilled my glass of milk. "A chaser," I said. "You're gonna need it. Oh, and by the way, you might not want to put it all in your--" He popped one in and started chewing. "--mouth.. at.. once. Um," I murmured, wincing.
Less than a moment later, it hit him. The look on his face started me laughing, and soon he was laughing while trying to swallow the gritty, foul thing. I held out the milk and he took it.
"Need something stronger?" I asked, and he turned to see me holding up the jug of bleach. He laughed harder, but kept himself together and managed to swallow. Damn. ;)
"That is the worst thing I've tasted in a long time..." he started.
"That you didn't make, yourself?" I teased, at the same time that he said, "...that I didn't make, myself." Laughter anew, both of us nearly doubled over in the kitchen, holding onto the counters, him trying to swallow liquid at the same time.
The fact that we still have uncontrollable giggle-fits together after ten years of marriage makes me happier than I can describe.
Be warned, though... For someone who's willingly tried the Bertie Botts' Sardine and Black Pepper flavored jelly beans to make a pronouncement like that, it's serious business.
Kids, don't try these at home.
But food substitutions aren't only unwelcome in kitty land...
Newman's Own Spelt Pretzels = good. Amazingly good. Just like the real thing, or maybe better.
Newman's Own Wheat free, dairy free Oreos = just the thing to put you off eating, for good.
I said this to Matt, so of course, he had to go and try his own Newman Oreo. I followed him to the kitchen and refilled my glass of milk. "A chaser," I said. "You're gonna need it. Oh, and by the way, you might not want to put it all in your--" He popped one in and started chewing. "--mouth.. at.. once. Um," I murmured, wincing.
Less than a moment later, it hit him. The look on his face started me laughing, and soon he was laughing while trying to swallow the gritty, foul thing. I held out the milk and he took it.
"Need something stronger?" I asked, and he turned to see me holding up the jug of bleach. He laughed harder, but kept himself together and managed to swallow. Damn. ;)
"That is the worst thing I've tasted in a long time..." he started.
"That you didn't make, yourself?" I teased, at the same time that he said, "...that I didn't make, myself." Laughter anew, both of us nearly doubled over in the kitchen, holding onto the counters, him trying to swallow liquid at the same time.
The fact that we still have uncontrollable giggle-fits together after ten years of marriage makes me happier than I can describe.
Be warned, though... For someone who's willingly tried the Bertie Botts' Sardine and Black Pepper flavored jelly beans to make a pronouncement like that, it's serious business.
Kids, don't try these at home.
